A NEW RECORD!!!!

Well, it's been a little over two months since Sony's Playstation 3 saw a release in Japan, and, wouldn't you know it, the price is already dropping. Is it because Sony has found a more efficient way to produce them? No. According to this, Sony has nothing to do drop. Retailers are just trying to get whatever they can for the 20GB model of the console, which the article claims "PS3 sales in Japan haven't cooled off, they've frozen."

Now this doesn't really seem like much of a surprise to us. Sony seems to be seeing the same problem here in America. Go into any game retailer, and you can see the PS3s just sitting on the shelves, not going anywhere. You can't even get retail price for them on eBay.

So, if you've already purchased a PS3, I'm sorry. And if you haven't, wait a month or two, and you'll have the opportunity to buy the cheapest Blu-ray DVD player/toilet on the market.

What sounds better to you? A Blu-ray DVD player at the high price of $1,000? Or a Blu-ray DVD player/toilet for $50? Do the right thing.

I Found Myself Lying In My Own Milk

I was awoken yesterday morning at around seven a.m. when my father came into my room. I got up to take out my retainer. When I returned, I found my blanket, soaked with Blaire nipple juice. I had trouble sleeping after that point. I had been in the middle of one of the best dreams in a long time when I was awoken, and my mind kept turning to it. I managed to get close to sleep around nine, but found myself tired of trying when I noticed the big spot on my sheet under my nipple.

I illegally downloaded Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan and Jackass Number Two. They were both good, but the former was the one that was hilarious. I'd highly recommend it to anyone with two dicks.

If anyone needs to take a shit at this point, we are in the same boat.

(Chris) Tucker Max

It looks like our old pal Tucker Max has been busy getting ready for Comedy Central on the television and writing a new book, Asshole Finish First. Tucker has had these (this and this) things to say about things. Personally, I don't know if the show would be that great, but the book is looking pretty good.

This Guy's Name is Frosty

"Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher," said Frosty Hardison, a parent of seven who also said that he believes the Earth is 14,000 years old. "The information that's being presented is a very cockeyed view of what the truth is. ... The Bible says that in the end times everything will burn up, but that perspective isn't in the DVD."


I'm just glad we have nutjobs like this guy to help destroy today's yoots.

So I guess what this guy is saying is as long as we have global warming, we will have a lower percentage of oxygen, and without sufficient oxygen, God's flames will die out quickly, leaving us to reap the benefits and retire early.

Thank you, Frosty. Now give me back my goddamn magic hat before you scare any more children with your shenanigans.

cheating hurts...:/ (You will laugh.)

Girl: is on the couch making out with a hot guy, her cellphone rings...

Girl:Hey babe, I'll be right back. I need to take this call.

Boy: Yeah okay. Sure.

She walks into the next room.

Girl: Hey! What's up?

Guy [on her cellphone]: Nothing, hey hun, do you think we could go do something later tonight? What are the chances my boss let me get out early.

Girl: Yeah, sounds great!

Guy [on her cellphone]: Okay. I'm right by your house, I'll come to get you now.

Girl: That's not such a good idea...

Guy [on her cellphone]: Why not?

Girl: I'm busy right now... sorry.

Guy [on her cellphone]: With what? It's our anniversary! You didn't make any other plans did you...?

In her head she yells, SHIT! Throws clothes back on quickly.
Girl: No No... I was just eating... with the family.

Guy [on her cellphone]: But I thought you said your family was away this weekend, up at your resort?

The guy walks into her house, turns the corner into the hallway. Goes downstairs, and finds his bestfriend on her couch, half un-dressed, trying to pull his pants back on and his girlfriend pulling her shirt over her head.

Guy: What the hell is going on?!

Girl: I can explain! Please listen to me!

Guy: Benny? How could you do this to me! Rachel! I thought you loved me! And yet, your sleeping with MY BEST FRIEND!!!!

Girl: John...!

John with tears in his eyes, he rushes out of room, and slams the door.

Benny climbs out of the window, starts his car, and drives off down the street.

Girl runs after her boyfriend. Yelling...

Girl: NOOOO! Please!! Come back John!! Pleeeeeasssse????!! She falls down and cries.

John turns around, looks straight at his girlfriend in tears.

John: Why? Rachel, why? I loved you! Oh my God, I'm in love with a whore. Does this mean I have to pay you now?!
Here take this as the cash. He drops a ring box on her lap.

She opens the ring box. Her jaw drops... Before her eyes is a diamond wedding ring.

Girl: You were going to propose?

Guy: Yeah... how dumb was I? And as he slowly walked back to his car, his headlights faded... And she was in despair.


Later that night, the girl got a phone call from the police saying he just jumped off the bridge and killed himself.



If you love/like someone, and you want them in your life forever. Repost in 380 seconds as "cheating hurts." Or your true love will walk away from you

Maître d'hôtel Yeats de William

I wrote this today because it was due today. Sorry if it seems rushed.

If there’s one thing I like to do, it’s explore. Explore what? Exactly. So, I’d like to take this opportunity to get to know a poet I otherwise know little about. William Butler Yeats seems to be a fairly well upheld figure in the poetry industry. I can’t recall ever reading any of Yeats’ poetry during a voyage in the past. This will be uncharted territory for me. I hope I don’t get killed.

“The Scholars” is a poem I can find myself relating to. It seems to be about people following the same path, because following the same path is what people do. Old men teach young men to write like they write. They all know the same people and think the same. And at the end it mentions Gaius Valerius Catullus: “Did their Catullus walk that way?” I did some research on this Catullus, and he seems to be quite amazing, based on my personal views. In “Catullus 16,” we see Catullus verbally attacking two of his critics, stating that he “will fuck you like a boy and throat-rape you.” I find this to be far from the norm when it comes to poetry and can’t help but think Yeats means to use it to make a point of being different. It seems different yet very exciting, especially when you are used to reading the same type of love poem. While many poets aim “To flatter beauty’s ignorant ear,” Catullus decided to rape beauty’s ignorant throat.

Yeats’ poem “The Stolen Child” describes children being taken away by faeries. This poem actually helped me out a great deal, because I have always wondered what happened to my brother. The poem best explains itself in four lines repeated through the entire work: “Come away, O human child!/To the waters and the wild/With a faery, hand in hand,/For the world’s more full of weeping than you can understand.” The point Yeats makes is that children shouldn’t cry about being taken away by faeries. That isn’t really that bad of a fate to have to face. These children are so young they have yet to see many of the evils this world offers. Some people get shot in the face. I am sure anyone who has been shot in the face would much rather have simply been taken away by faeries. This is the exact point Yeats is trying to make, and I completely agree with him.

After moving on to “When You Are Old,” a pattern begins to show itself. Yeats poems tend to paint a picture of peacefulness with a slight case of anarchy. The first, “The Scholars” depicts people following a familiar, relaxing path, but dares us to do otherwise. “The Stolen Child” gives us hope for our children’s future: they shall spend their days in a far-off land with cute little faeries. The dark side of this is that the faeries are most likely eating the children. Yeats is trying to tell us what we don’t want to hear while covering it up with pretty lies. “When You Are Old” has the same intent, yet the bad part feels not bad at all. The poem makes you realize how close to death you are, but instead of creating feelings of sorrow, it creates feelings of other sorrow. The sorrow is good. You feel just good enough about your accomplishments.

“The Lake Isle of Innisfree” is an average feeling poem. It strikes up no feelings in my gut, but it does a fine job of reflecting what I think most of us are after. A man plans to move away, possibly running from some old pain, to find peace elsewhere. We’ve all surely been in that position. I know I’m in it right now. It’s just far too painful for me to live in a world where Thanksgiving only comes once a year. I mean, how am I supposed to live off of only 5,000 calories a day? I need so much more, yet it is so far away. I am truly heartbroken. Give me a cigarette.

Being the good parent he was, Yeats wanted to make sure his daughter turned out to be beautiful, rather than ugly. It is what any parent would want for his or her daughter. The worst thing I could ever imagine as a parent would be having an unattractive daughter. Yeats sets a good example for parents everywhere. If you can’t afford to make your daughter pretty, you’re not a good parent.

“Leda and the Swan” breaks away from the traditional Yeats. It takes the advice given in “The Scholars.” In this work, a nice lady named Leda finds herself in a position we’ve all been in after a long night of drinking. She is making babies with a swan. Raped by Zeus? I hardly think so. It seems to me like she just needed an excuse for something she never expected to end up on Youtube. Like in the earlier poems, we see a good situation gone awry.

My favorite characteristic about Keats’ writing is his ability to urge one not to follow protocol while following protocol. It’s somewhat like someone working at Wal-Mart and telling shoppers to make purchases somewhere else. It’s a good idea, but it takes a real hero to pull it off.

Yeats, I like what you’ve done with the place. It was fantastic meeting you.

Here's a Confession

Deandra's pupils get bigger when she looks at me.

Hit Me

I lost my card. Well, I didn't lose it, but someone else gained it just the same.

Here's a nice little article about politics for yous.

I'm hungry, so I think I'm goan turn in an application or two today.

I downloaded F-Zero on the virtual console. I wouldn't recommend doing it unless you're a really big fan of old games that used to be fun but aren't even worth playing today.

I'm gonna start saving some dollars to buy some whills to get around after I get enough money to move out. Holla.

Shit

I've been playing my Wii and watching The History Channel.

Wii is fun.

I also had a PS3 for just a little while.


I got tired of that shit pretty quick. I thought about selling it on eBay, but that would've taken too long. I put it in the trunk and pushed the car off the cliff. Problem solved.

Um.

I have two papers due tomorrow. The first one doesn't have a supposed set length. I think I'll shoot for at least three pages, if not four. I think the other one is to be no longer than one page. I also have a quiz due in my math class.

I went to Greenwood with Stephanie Mae the other day. I found a couple of books at Waldenbooks that I would like to have.

My plans for the next few Wiiks are far and few. I mean big. Fuck.

Enough of this shit.

Matthew . . .

We Had a Good Time at McDonald's

I dreamt my friend was reteaching me Japanese.

Try one of these out.

The weekend was all right. And by weekend, I mean Thursday up until now. I got to hang out and lift weights. I've been reliving my childhood with The Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past/Four Swords. I've been writing a lot every day. I write about whatever comes to mind. I've stopped eating.

We all fall down.

Maybe It's a Stupid Theory or Maybe Just Stupidity

I started reading Ken Kesey's One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest the other day. There is a tremendous quote from the Native American narrator early on that I would like to share with you, the people: "But it's the truth even if it didn't happen." I sat and turned it over in my head for a little while. It struck me hard--right in the kidney. The idea seems offbeat, yet somewhat assuring. Does something really have to be true in order to have happened? No. And this proves it. Next question.

I got Final Fantasy XII Monday night. It's one of the best movies in video game packaging I've seen.

The end of The Count was amazing. Just like the beginning and the 1400 pages between them. I want to read at least two other books before I read it again. Ross wants to borrow it. I don't see a problem with it. As long as he doesn't shove it up his ass like he does everything else. Anyway. Go ahead and by this version. After you obtain and read that version, do what I'm about to do: grab the Robin Buss translation, published by Penguin Classics. Buss' translation, from what I've read, has refurbished the language for our time (bad) and has reinstated all of the sex and drugs, left out in previous translations.

Bye.

Home Alone

The title really says it all.

My whole family is home alone.

I got a call last yesterday. I didn't recognize the number, but I was somewhat interested in finding out who would want to call me. It was Gamestop lady. Joe told me her Final Fantasy VII name, but I can't pull it up at the moment. She invited me to a party that starts at eleven o'clock tonight. I get to pick up my new game Final Fantasy XII at twelve o'clock while I'm at the party. Wow. She sure is nice.

I didn't sleep last night. I was up half the night reading The Count of Monte Cristo and the other half was spent trying to convince myself I wasn't M. Danglars and to stop worrying about my money woes.

I eventually made it out of bed and to school. My classes were cool, until the between era, where I started to feel bad in the tummy area. I actually felt bad in comparative religions, but I couldn't bring myself to unleash the fury of toxins that had built up in my colon. I decided on my break that I would not be attending my favorite class, poetry for Blaire, at the end of the day. I went to my folklore class and while conversing with others of the advantages of having a PENIS PULL/POLE/IDON'TKNOWWHATWEWEREREALLYTALKINGABOUT,ITWASMORELIKEWEWEREJUSTHAVINGFUNWITHAMADEUPWORD, I completely forgot about my pains.

I came home just the same, and with many hours left before the party, I am sure I will have the last 70 pages read in no time.

I like the new features, especially the page building thing. The only thing I don't like about it is the template change. The template is way off now and they use secret codes to keep me from doing it myself. Oh well. I figured it out once; I'll figure it out again.

Fucking Google AdSense just shows links to online survey stuff. Whatever. It's a party.

I Just Moved

To Blogger beta.

Holy shit.

The difference is unimaginable.

I mean, I couldn't have ever imagined a new blogger that is exactly the same as the old one.

No.

I haven't had time to check it out. I just now moved my blogs.

I need to make an AdSense thing for my Intendo blog so I can become a millionaire.

Up the down storiod.

If anyone can get me a copy of any kind of Linux, let me know. I want it rill bad.

Amazing

I finally found a good version of Firefox 2.

It's called Firefox 2 RC 3. Go ahead and click that link to download the installation software if you want. But I would recommend reading through this before you do. You may not like what you'd be getting yourself into. The RC stands for Release Candidate. It hasn't even been released in beta form. Well, this is a beta form, but it hasn't been released as a beta version. You know what I mean.

I really like this early version of Firefox 2. Some of my add-ons from the past weren't compatible, but those were the gay ones I never used anyway. My favorite feature is the new spell check feature. Or maybe it's an add-on I downloaded. I don't know. I've got a spell checker I can click on in my Google toolbar, but I've also got the browser underlining my spelling errors. Whatever.

I also bought a Wii on the--whatever day Gamestop had the reserves in. I was fifth in line if my memory serves me the way Walter Clopton Wingfield would. I also bought a one gig memory stick/card/human/whateverthefuck.

I can feel myself getting more and more awesome every day. I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up one day and discovered I didn't have to talk to you assholes anymore. Goodbye assholes, hello fellow janitors at Comedy Central.

I just found out my good friend Jess is a retard. I think we all new it the whole time. We were just waiting for the right moment.

I think I'm done.

Fuck Ozma

I spent around three hours fighting the fucker tonight, but I just can't seem to get him. I can get close, but that's when he decides to kill me on the spot. Fuck. I don't know. I guess I'll have to change my strategy. I'll try again tomorrow.

I added a new commercial to my Intendo Games blog. It's a good one.

Stefan was here for Fall Breaks, so we hung out most of the time.

We made a get well soon card for Rob, and we put it in his yard for everyone to see.


I hope he is feeling better.

I kinda hurt my arm again while I was doing pull-ups, so I failed when I tried to get my bicepts in. But I'm pretty much kicking ass at racquetball, so who the fuck?

I wrote a funny-as-fuck one-and-a-half-page four-page paper for my poetry class. It'd probably be too far over you guys' head, so I'll let you imagine.



Bitch is crazy--keep on dreaming.

i thought i was ganon but once he was sealed away

So much has happened. I've wanted to blog about things, but I'm just too lazy. For rill.

My tumor has gotten bigger, I'm assuming.

I serched my computer, destroying old documents, and finding some nice things in the process. Not all of them are that great, but I like them anyway.

I started a new blog. I really don't know what this blog will be, but from the looks of it, I'd say something having to do with my life-long love for Princess Zelda.

I'm getting a lot better at Star Fox Command.

I don't sleep at night.

I have trouble staying awake at school.

I have trouble reading of Le Comte, because I am usually very tired.

But I am about half-way thru it.

It'll pick up once I get my studies done.

Um . . .

I had to break a girls heart the other night.

I felt bad, but it sure was a great time.


I'm lifting weights a lot again.

I'll let you know.

Nintendo Fusion Tour is this Thursday. You can play some Wii with me or some DS. I might bring my DS to pwn some bitches at Star Fox Command. It's being headlined by Hawthorne Heights. The others is Relient K, Emery, Plaine White T's and The Sleeping.

Goodbye.

I made a new group on the Facebook that you guys can check out. Go ahead and ask to be let in if you like what you see. I don't know if that link will work for anybody, but I'm not gonna check it. Let me know if it doesn't work with a comment, and I won't change it, but I'll know.

I'm Drunk

I have many realizations when I'm drunk. I just had one that I found very much worth sharing.


It is about Tom Cruise.

You see, Tom Cruise has for many years been viewed as a great actor.

What I have come to realize is that being a good actor does not have a thing to do with your acting ability [not true (Winona Rider)]; it is all about being a good judge of what you act in.

A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for his religious beliefs. A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for crazy antics. What I have come to realize is that Tom Cruise is much more sane that most of the population guilty of condemning him.

To celebrate this finding of mine, I have created a list of criteria that disenfanchise (very legally) idiots who have no place in talking in such a way of others.

I am talking about you if:

1. Your favorite show is "The Real World."
2. Your favorite show is "Laguna Beach."
3. Your favorite show is "Big Brother."
4. Your favorite book falls somewhere in the "Gossip Girls" section.
5. You have any preferences falling in any category anywhere near anything I have just mentioned.

If anyone has any other stupid ass criteria to add to the list, please do so through commentation (I'm not sure if that's a word--Spell check didn't recognize it, and neither did I--I am pretty drunk.) through my comments (breasts) link.

I will allow the ones I see fit; the ones I feel don't belong will be discarded.

Thank you for your crazy-ass time, you fuck-asses.

Okay, I just checked "disenfranchise" with Google. Evidently the only proper way of putting it is "disenfranchised." I also come across people using periods outside the quotation marks. I have seen this many times in Le Comte de Monte-Cristo (I just checked that shit out and I am very proud to say I got it super-right on my first try while being drunk or needing help from Google.) or The Count of Monte Cristo, if you support President Bush.

Here's how I feel about it: You write how you write, and that's what makes literature and language what it is. You can take control and change the rules if that is how you choose to do things. It is as simple as that. If someone wants to change the rules of writing, all he or she needs to do is write how he or she feels fit.

If you want a definition of something, go to Google.com and type "define" followed by ":" and then a space and the word (ex. define: fuckshit).

That's all you need.

Good night. For rill.

You Said Your Girlfriend's Pregnant Now, How Far Along is She?

I have lots of new fun stories to tell, but I'm tired, and I'd never tell you guys anyway.

It looks like our old friend is at it again.

Google has recently released an alternative to Microsoft Word. You can sign up for writely.com beta and you don't even need a Google account.

Two new films from Trey Parker and Matt Stone? Fuck that.

Get Down On Your Knees and Tell Me You Love Me

I've been meaning to get this out for awhile. I hope you can read his comments.


My printer doesn't always work so well.




I also came across an old batch of Cotton Candy today. I'm expecting some big things to happen with that in these next few weeks.

Credit Card? You Got It.

I know I say this a lot, but I just swung my right foot out too much when I turned into the bathroom. I didn't actually turn into the bathroom; you know what I mean. Anyway, this miscalculation led to me losing two toes. I used to make this mistake all the time when I was younger. I actually can't remember the last time it's happened. My foot hurts.

My good friend Jesse (I call him Jess. He left a comment for me yesterday under that name, but he is Jesse everywhere else on Blogger. I'm not quite sure how he managed to pull that one off.) has recently started a blog. I find this to be quite exciting. You see, Jesse will be going off to school soon and I shall need a way to monitor his movements. His blog only has one post in its current state, but it will most likely grow to several hundred in the next few months. His first post is a very good one. He describes the joy of his two new, very good friends described as "one male and one female." He has decided to keep the names classified because he feels names are pointless and all that matters is that we all support President Bush. I couldn't agree with him more, but I'd still like to share these names with you. The "boy" he writes of is none other than the late, great Nick Allen. I don't know where Jesse's fondness of Nick came from. It must have been that night Nick wouldn't drink because he had to drive home in ten minutes (Pussy! Cough!Cough! Pussy!). I just checked my medication that I haven't taken in months, and I have six half-pills left. Let me know. They're gonna go fast. The "girl" in this mysterious tale is also a good friend of mine, Zachatatl. You see, the night Nick wouldn't drink was also the night everyone else did (Cough!Cough! StrongBoy!). Zach later decided to piss all over my dad's car. This caused bad blood between the two of us. The problem with this was the fact that I already had enough bad blood from the raised prolactin levels. It was fine when I could lactate, but now I have milk coming out of one titty and Bon Jovi classics coming out the other.

My point: We need more people in power setting good examples for our youth. Jesse, being the big CEO that he is, doesn't need to go to college. He already has all the riches any man could possibly dream of. What could he possibly accomplish by going to college that he hasn't accomplished at this point? Well, I'll tell you. He's setting an example for people like Derek Weaver--people who are poor and ugly to the most extreme circumstance.

I need ice for my foot. Holla-atchaboy!