Showing posts with label Ashley Woolen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ashley Woolen. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Karma Po-lice

Well, I went into my room to unhook my internets, and I noticed the CPU was on top of the 2wire mini modem thing, and it was hot. All I did was move that guy out, and then the phone worked. I called Stefan, and he and Dane was on they way o'er here. They got here, and then I drove ourselves over to Karma. The first thing I bought was a roller for cigarettes. Cigarettes are female cigars. That means if a guy smokes cigarettes, he's a pussy. After that, I saw Justin Schmitt and bought three Fall Out Boy CD's. (Is that right? I don't remember all of the apostrophe rules.) I eventually made my way back home, where I tried to call Audrey. That didn't work out so well. I guess she doesn't like to have her phone out at the golf places, where she works all day and night--give someone else a chonce. I listened to my new Fall Out Boy disks while I got on the internets and bought two Fall Out Boy CD's, an Offspring dual-disc, and an Offspring DVD. Then I purchased the Fall Out Boy fanclub kit thing. Then my dad came home and then we got some pizza. And then I watched "That 70's Shit." I am very tired. UPN is addictive.

Kylie and Ashley double-you came over here yesterday. I gave Kylie her card and birthday present. I got them right before they came over. They laughed pretty hard at the card and the gifts. Then we all went into my room to watch Kinsey on DVD. Then they left. I drew a smiley face on my penis and went with my brother to get some physicals. We got to the doctor place and we kept punching each other in the face. The nurse was freaking out about it, but we just laughed. I read the whole eye chart with my right eye. It took about ten minutes to do it. My brother and I were laughing the whole time, and when I did read it, it was with my left eye, clearly looking between my fingers. I also peed on my hand and on the floor, just like I did at school that one time when I was taking a drug test. We went to McDonald's after the facts, and I think that's about all I did that day.

Monday, July 25, 2005

Super Mario Bitches

I'm gonna do the Nintendo one first.

It's like this:
I was asleep in my bed one day when Kylie called me on the telephone. She asked me if I wanted to go fishing with her and Alex Miller. I agreed. I got up, put some clothes on, left with Kylie and Alex in Alex's big sexy truck, went to Trista's house to retrieve her Will, went to the cemetery, fished with my penis, took Will home, and then Alex took Kylie and me back to my house. We were gonna go swimming at her house, but after reading the newspaper, she decided she would rather play Nintendo. So I hooked up the NES, and we spent countless hours playing Super Mario Bros. 3. I pretty much kicked ass, and Kylie just kept fucking up and dying. We did the battle thing a lot, and I always came out on top in that as well. Ashley suddenly appeared, and the three of us went to McDonald's for some food. After they left, I went to (nothing) to purchase some diapers and a bag of chips. I went home to get my directions to Dr. Duran's house, and my brother was listening to some "Scars" by Papa Roach in our room. I ran back out to the car, expecting "Scars" to still be on when I fired it up. Then I realized that my brother was simply listening to an mp3 on the computer and the radio couldn't possibly be picking it up. But when I started the car and the radio came on, guess what was on. I went there, talked to some people, and then left. I left because I wanted to get some sleep before going into work for twelve hours. I got in bed and couldn't get there. The end.

Monday, May 23, 2005

Daring to Try, to Do it or Die, I Gotta Be Dead

Friday:

I took my AP bio final. I then went to AP bio. Then I went with some of the squib people to breakfast. Then I went back to school to work on my page. Then I went home. Then I went to the track sectional. Then I ran a PR in the 4x800. I ran a 2:18.Then I went potty. Then I went to Taco Bell with Audrey, Jen, Chrissy, and Ashley Woolen. Then Eric Byrer and some foreigners showed up. Then we were all gonna go to my house, and then I went there, and everyone else just kinda decided to not show up. Then I ended up going to play basketball ( me, Stefan, Jon/Josh, Stephanie, and Matt). I kinda just stood there for a while, thinking about stuff. I spent a lot of the time looking a the tree behind the basketball goal, imagining seeing myself hanging from it. It made me feel a little better to see that the world would still be there even if I was dead. Then I took Stephanie home. Then I went to pick Stefan up from his house. Then I helped him look for his Team America: World Police special edition unrated version DVD. Then we watched the movie. Then I had some pizza, and then I went to bed.


Saturday:

I did nothing, and then I went to the movie theater and did some fun things for about and hour. Then Tyler and I shook hands. Then I went to Jim Peck's house. After a while, I drove by Adam Barlow's house to see if he was around, and then I went to the Schmitts' house, and I broke some dumb broad's back. I ate some things. We exchanged stories, then Eric Byrer left. It was about one a.m. by this time, and Justin told me he was going to bed at two. We went out into the one room, and we discussed Stephen King and some other things. Then he offered to lend me his Donnie Darko The Director's Cut DVD. I looked at the clock, and it was a little after three. I was quite surprised by this, us talking so long. It reminded me of the time last summer when I went over to the Schmitts' house and was talking to Justin and Matt Baker and ended up leaving at three a.m. So, I went home and had some pizza and took a shower, and then I went to bed at about 4:30.


Sunday:

I woke up at about 1. I had some pizza for breakfast. I went over to the Gahimers' to watch Donnie Darko. They said it was stupid, and it pissed me off. I hate when people label something they don't understand as stupid. I was pissed off even further when Stephanie turned the TV to a movie that was stupid and pretended it was something special. I went home at this point, because my head was starting to act up. I took some pills when I got home, and then I watched Donnie Darko with my brother. Then I ate some Pizza. Then I went back to the Gahimer place to watch "Family Guy." Luckily, Fox decided to play fucking stupid-ass Star Wars, so I watched "Desparate Housewives" instead. Rex died. I guess he won't having anymore problems with crying when he ejaculates. Then I watched some more TV (Bam and Rosanne). Then I went home and called Amanda. I woke her ass right up and exchanged stories with her. Then I did some more things, and that's about it.

Monday, May 09, 2005

Beat your Track

Um. Well.


Late Saturday night, Stefan and I went over to Stephanie's house. This was after I made out with Eric Voss. Justin Cory had also delivered a pizza here. "Okay, back to the bitches." We went over there, and we didn't know what the situation was with the sleeping and such, so we decided to go around back to let Stephanie know we were there.

Bad idea.

We went around front, and I knocked three times. Jessica came out and demanded that we come in. Stephanie threw a fit, and she said Amnityville. Things got way better with the nacautica and the...fuck...what else?...shit...something about semi-trucks and that's all I can remember right now. Stefan and I decided to take Stephanie to her sister's place on the west side. Stephanie didn't give me good directions, so we got lost quite a few times. We finally made it, and Stephanie seemed pissed off about something. We took off from there, and I drove right across the grassy plains. That was fun as shit. After that, we went back to my house, and Stefan got his car, and I got his cellular, and I followed him to his house, and I got in his car, and we went to the middle school and burnt some shit out in the grass, and then we went back to his house, and Susan and Ashley Woolen and Tom Bonehead came over, and I read some stories to them, and we all had a good laugh, and then Susan told us the story of her lesbian, and then Shotaro and Bryce came over, and we all hanged out for a little while, and then I went to my home, and then I did some stuff there, and then I called Amanda, and it was, like, 3:30 A.M., and she is an hour in the future now, so it was about 4:30 A.M. by her watch, and we talked for a pretty long time, and then she got in bed and sounded tired and started speaking some crazy jibberish, so I hung up on her ass, and then I did some more stuff, and then I went to bed.

My mother woke me up a few times the next day so she could get me to go to my grandparents' house for mother's [or is it mothers'? (or is it mothers?)] day, and I was gonna go, but Stefan came over and wanted me to run with him, and then I made a horrible mistake, and my day ended up being ruined, so I pretty much just laid in my bed after that, but I did get up a few times to do stuff, and then I had to go to (censored) to get some poster-board for my government project. That shit took forever. But the new Family Guy was on and it was pretty sweet. I was the only one in my family who got the Vincent Van Gogh joke. I explained it to my dad, and he laughed. That's all for that day. Wait! It isn't. One more thing. Final Fantasy Anthology came with a CD with all of the great scores from Final Fantasy V and VI. There are some beautiful pieces of Super Nintendo music on that guy, and I forgot all about it for the longest time, and it brought back many wonderful memories.

I went back to school today. It was gay as fuck. We took the AP Bio test (the AP test), and I was awesome, but I can't tell you what I did, because that would be illegal. Mr. Lux bought us all snickerses for our break, and that was nice. After all of that, I went to fitness, where I benched a lot of shit. Everyone was impressed.

We're doing this debate project in English, and my group is pro-choice. I found this place with some pro-choice slogans on the internet, and one of them is really good and I like it:

"Hey George, Stay out of My Bush!"

Anyway, I really liked that one.

I did find a bunch of pictures of aborted fetuses last week. That was pretty sweet.

We had a big meet in Franklin today. I ran the last leg of the 4x800, and we were already so far behind, that I decided not to be so serious about it. Right off the bat, I was skipping around, and then I was yelling at the Lees and Pierson, and then at the end of my second and final lap, I tried to pass the baton to Tate, and he didn't take it, and my split was 2:28, which is 9 seconds slower than the 2:19 I ran in fitness the other day. My best time in a meet at this point is 2:23. Stephanie and Emily showed up and tried to take advantage of Sam. Luckily, I was there to save him. We all went up to the place and said hey to everyone and Stephanie kept flirting with my dad. I later ran the 800 and did it in 2:20. My best time ever in a meet (my already best time ever is 2:18, set by me in fitness a long time ago this year) was right there. I went back up to sit with Stephanie and Emily, and my grandparents gave me some grape Gatorade, and it was good. Sam was way ahead of Stefan and Alex in the 3200, and Emily was gonna go out with him if he won, but Stefan beat him by like this much and it was a good race. Alex got way behind because he has a hernia, and he had sex with Kristen. At the end, we all went down to talk to Derek (sp?) Atwood (?) and Danny Nuthak, and Stephanie fell in love with Danny again, but she was afraid to touch him.

We all went home, and Stefan saw Cheesy walking in Franklin, and I wanted to drive Krissy's new stupid-ass Beatle, but the dumb bitch wouldn't let me, and then I found out where Ani lives, and then I went home for some McDonald's, and here I am.

Wait.

I told Sam he should touch Stephanie's boobies, and he said it would be sexual assault, and I told him she was an illegal immigrant and there was nothing she could do, and that's all there is to that story.

Shit. I just realized how early we got back. Damn.
 
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