I'm Drunk

I have many realizations when I'm drunk. I just had one that I found very much worth sharing.


It is about Tom Cruise.

You see, Tom Cruise has for many years been viewed as a great actor.

What I have come to realize is that being a good actor does not have a thing to do with your acting ability [not true (Winona Rider)]; it is all about being a good judge of what you act in.

A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for his religious beliefs. A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for crazy antics. What I have come to realize is that Tom Cruise is much more sane that most of the population guilty of condemning him.

To celebrate this finding of mine, I have created a list of criteria that disenfanchise (very legally) idiots who have no place in talking in such a way of others.

I am talking about you if:

1. Your favorite show is "The Real World."
2. Your favorite show is "Laguna Beach."
3. Your favorite show is "Big Brother."
4. Your favorite book falls somewhere in the "Gossip Girls" section.
5. You have any preferences falling in any category anywhere near anything I have just mentioned.

If anyone has any other stupid ass criteria to add to the list, please do so through commentation (I'm not sure if that's a word--Spell check didn't recognize it, and neither did I--I am pretty drunk.) through my comments (breasts) link.

I will allow the ones I see fit; the ones I feel don't belong will be discarded.

Thank you for your crazy-ass time, you fuck-asses.

Okay, I just checked "disenfranchise" with Google. Evidently the only proper way of putting it is "disenfranchised." I also come across people using periods outside the quotation marks. I have seen this many times in Le Comte de Monte-Cristo (I just checked that shit out and I am very proud to say I got it super-right on my first try while being drunk or needing help from Google.) or The Count of Monte Cristo, if you support President Bush.

Here's how I feel about it: You write how you write, and that's what makes literature and language what it is. You can take control and change the rules if that is how you choose to do things. It is as simple as that. If someone wants to change the rules of writing, all he or she needs to do is write how he or she feels fit.

If you want a definition of something, go to Google.com and type "define" followed by ":" and then a space and the word (ex. define: fuckshit).

That's all you need.

Good night. For rill.