Home Alone

The title really says it all.

My whole family is home alone.

I got a call last yesterday. I didn't recognize the number, but I was somewhat interested in finding out who would want to call me. It was Gamestop lady. Joe told me her Final Fantasy VII name, but I can't pull it up at the moment. She invited me to a party that starts at eleven o'clock tonight. I get to pick up my new game Final Fantasy XII at twelve o'clock while I'm at the party. Wow. She sure is nice.

I didn't sleep last night. I was up half the night reading The Count of Monte Cristo and the other half was spent trying to convince myself I wasn't M. Danglars and to stop worrying about my money woes.

I eventually made it out of bed and to school. My classes were cool, until the between era, where I started to feel bad in the tummy area. I actually felt bad in comparative religions, but I couldn't bring myself to unleash the fury of toxins that had built up in my colon. I decided on my break that I would not be attending my favorite class, poetry for Blaire, at the end of the day. I went to my folklore class and while conversing with others of the advantages of having a PENIS PULL/POLE/IDON'TKNOWWHATWEWEREREALLYTALKINGABOUT,ITWASMORELIKEWEWEREJUSTHAVINGFUNWITHAMADEUPWORD, I completely forgot about my pains.

I came home just the same, and with many hours left before the party, I am sure I will have the last 70 pages read in no time.

I like the new features, especially the page building thing. The only thing I don't like about it is the template change. The template is way off now and they use secret codes to keep me from doing it myself. Oh well. I figured it out once; I'll figure it out again.

Fucking Google AdSense just shows links to online survey stuff. Whatever. It's a party.

I Just Moved

To Blogger beta.

Holy shit.

The difference is unimaginable.

I mean, I couldn't have ever imagined a new blogger that is exactly the same as the old one.

No.

I haven't had time to check it out. I just now moved my blogs.

I need to make an AdSense thing for my Intendo blog so I can become a millionaire.

Up the down storiod.

If anyone can get me a copy of any kind of Linux, let me know. I want it rill bad.

Amazing

I finally found a good version of Firefox 2.

It's called Firefox 2 RC 3. Go ahead and click that link to download the installation software if you want. But I would recommend reading through this before you do. You may not like what you'd be getting yourself into. The RC stands for Release Candidate. It hasn't even been released in beta form. Well, this is a beta form, but it hasn't been released as a beta version. You know what I mean.

I really like this early version of Firefox 2. Some of my add-ons from the past weren't compatible, but those were the gay ones I never used anyway. My favorite feature is the new spell check feature. Or maybe it's an add-on I downloaded. I don't know. I've got a spell checker I can click on in my Google toolbar, but I've also got the browser underlining my spelling errors. Whatever.

I also bought a Wii on the--whatever day Gamestop had the reserves in. I was fifth in line if my memory serves me the way Walter Clopton Wingfield would. I also bought a one gig memory stick/card/human/whateverthefuck.

I can feel myself getting more and more awesome every day. I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up one day and discovered I didn't have to talk to you assholes anymore. Goodbye assholes, hello fellow janitors at Comedy Central.

I just found out my good friend Jess is a retard. I think we all new it the whole time. We were just waiting for the right moment.

I think I'm done.

Fuck Ozma

I spent around three hours fighting the fucker tonight, but I just can't seem to get him. I can get close, but that's when he decides to kill me on the spot. Fuck. I don't know. I guess I'll have to change my strategy. I'll try again tomorrow.

I added a new commercial to my Intendo Games blog. It's a good one.

Stefan was here for Fall Breaks, so we hung out most of the time.

We made a get well soon card for Rob, and we put it in his yard for everyone to see.


I hope he is feeling better.

I kinda hurt my arm again while I was doing pull-ups, so I failed when I tried to get my bicepts in. But I'm pretty much kicking ass at racquetball, so who the fuck?

I wrote a funny-as-fuck one-and-a-half-page four-page paper for my poetry class. It'd probably be too far over you guys' head, so I'll let you imagine.



Bitch is crazy--keep on dreaming.

i thought i was ganon but once he was sealed away

So much has happened. I've wanted to blog about things, but I'm just too lazy. For rill.

My tumor has gotten bigger, I'm assuming.

I serched my computer, destroying old documents, and finding some nice things in the process. Not all of them are that great, but I like them anyway.

I started a new blog. I really don't know what this blog will be, but from the looks of it, I'd say something having to do with my life-long love for Princess Zelda.

I'm getting a lot better at Star Fox Command.

I don't sleep at night.

I have trouble staying awake at school.

I have trouble reading of Le Comte, because I am usually very tired.

But I am about half-way thru it.

It'll pick up once I get my studies done.

Um . . .

I had to break a girls heart the other night.

I felt bad, but it sure was a great time.


I'm lifting weights a lot again.

I'll let you know.

Nintendo Fusion Tour is this Thursday. You can play some Wii with me or some DS. I might bring my DS to pwn some bitches at Star Fox Command. It's being headlined by Hawthorne Heights. The others is Relient K, Emery, Plaine White T's and The Sleeping.

Goodbye.

I made a new group on the Facebook that you guys can check out. Go ahead and ask to be let in if you like what you see. I don't know if that link will work for anybody, but I'm not gonna check it. Let me know if it doesn't work with a comment, and I won't change it, but I'll know.

I'm Drunk

I have many realizations when I'm drunk. I just had one that I found very much worth sharing.


It is about Tom Cruise.

You see, Tom Cruise has for many years been viewed as a great actor.

What I have come to realize is that being a good actor does not have a thing to do with your acting ability [not true (Winona Rider)]; it is all about being a good judge of what you act in.

A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for his religious beliefs. A lot of people hate on Tom Cruise for crazy antics. What I have come to realize is that Tom Cruise is much more sane that most of the population guilty of condemning him.

To celebrate this finding of mine, I have created a list of criteria that disenfanchise (very legally) idiots who have no place in talking in such a way of others.

I am talking about you if:

1. Your favorite show is "The Real World."
2. Your favorite show is "Laguna Beach."
3. Your favorite show is "Big Brother."
4. Your favorite book falls somewhere in the "Gossip Girls" section.
5. You have any preferences falling in any category anywhere near anything I have just mentioned.

If anyone has any other stupid ass criteria to add to the list, please do so through commentation (I'm not sure if that's a word--Spell check didn't recognize it, and neither did I--I am pretty drunk.) through my comments (breasts) link.

I will allow the ones I see fit; the ones I feel don't belong will be discarded.

Thank you for your crazy-ass time, you fuck-asses.

Okay, I just checked "disenfranchise" with Google. Evidently the only proper way of putting it is "disenfranchised." I also come across people using periods outside the quotation marks. I have seen this many times in Le Comte de Monte-Cristo (I just checked that shit out and I am very proud to say I got it super-right on my first try while being drunk or needing help from Google.) or The Count of Monte Cristo, if you support President Bush.

Here's how I feel about it: You write how you write, and that's what makes literature and language what it is. You can take control and change the rules if that is how you choose to do things. It is as simple as that. If someone wants to change the rules of writing, all he or she needs to do is write how he or she feels fit.

If you want a definition of something, go to Google.com and type "define" followed by ":" and then a space and the word (ex. define: fuckshit).

That's all you need.

Good night. For rill.

You Said Your Girlfriend's Pregnant Now, How Far Along is She?

I have lots of new fun stories to tell, but I'm tired, and I'd never tell you guys anyway.

It looks like our old friend is at it again.

Google has recently released an alternative to Microsoft Word. You can sign up for writely.com beta and you don't even need a Google account.

Two new films from Trey Parker and Matt Stone? Fuck that.

Get Down On Your Knees and Tell Me You Love Me

I've been meaning to get this out for awhile. I hope you can read his comments.


My printer doesn't always work so well.




I also came across an old batch of Cotton Candy today. I'm expecting some big things to happen with that in these next few weeks.

Credit Card? You Got It.

I know I say this a lot, but I just swung my right foot out too much when I turned into the bathroom. I didn't actually turn into the bathroom; you know what I mean. Anyway, this miscalculation led to me losing two toes. I used to make this mistake all the time when I was younger. I actually can't remember the last time it's happened. My foot hurts.

My good friend Jesse (I call him Jess. He left a comment for me yesterday under that name, but he is Jesse everywhere else on Blogger. I'm not quite sure how he managed to pull that one off.) has recently started a blog. I find this to be quite exciting. You see, Jesse will be going off to school soon and I shall need a way to monitor his movements. His blog only has one post in its current state, but it will most likely grow to several hundred in the next few months. His first post is a very good one. He describes the joy of his two new, very good friends described as "one male and one female." He has decided to keep the names classified because he feels names are pointless and all that matters is that we all support President Bush. I couldn't agree with him more, but I'd still like to share these names with you. The "boy" he writes of is none other than the late, great Nick Allen. I don't know where Jesse's fondness of Nick came from. It must have been that night Nick wouldn't drink because he had to drive home in ten minutes (Pussy! Cough!Cough! Pussy!). I just checked my medication that I haven't taken in months, and I have six half-pills left. Let me know. They're gonna go fast. The "girl" in this mysterious tale is also a good friend of mine, Zachatatl. You see, the night Nick wouldn't drink was also the night everyone else did (Cough!Cough! StrongBoy!). Zach later decided to piss all over my dad's car. This caused bad blood between the two of us. The problem with this was the fact that I already had enough bad blood from the raised prolactin levels. It was fine when I could lactate, but now I have milk coming out of one titty and Bon Jovi classics coming out the other.

My point: We need more people in power setting good examples for our youth. Jesse, being the big CEO that he is, doesn't need to go to college. He already has all the riches any man could possibly dream of. What could he possibly accomplish by going to college that he hasn't accomplished at this point? Well, I'll tell you. He's setting an example for people like Derek Weaver--people who are poor and ugly to the most extreme circumstance.

I need ice for my foot. Holla-atchaboy!

How I Spent My Summer (Working) Vacation (Vacation)

This summer has been a blast. I have been on vacation from my life as well as my blogging career. Here are a few of the gems you have missed out on.

I hung out with the guys. Nick is on the left. Randal is in the middle. And Jimmy is the lazy one on the right.

Randal left after I scared his dog and made her run into a door and then caused her to piss on the floor. It took Nick almost no time at all to get his pants off.

I also taught some bad language to some animals. If you can't make out what this character is saying, I can only do this for you, "I want your dick . . . That's a mouthful." Now, I only taught him every word up until "dick," mind you. The rest was all him. These video games are getting smart.

Not two minutes later did I witness my brother (Brandon) on top of my sister (Ashley).

Then I kissed a French guy after our race.

I Had Another Day

I woke up today. I finished some Tucker Max delectables. Kylie called me. I got a hair cut.

Kylie pretending to know how to read.

Kylie pretending to know how to cut hair.

I got some of my old socks from Stefan and left my present socks there.

Back to Dashboard

UnderTheRose09

Who is this?

They instant messaged me, but I didn't want to stay on, so I declined. Let me know.

Tired

That is why I'm going to bed.

Fuck Fuck Shit Fuck

So I'm pretty much just pissed off right now. It was a waste of a day if you ask me. I need to be going to bed, but I'm pretty sure I'm too pissed to sleep. I wanted to read today too, but I don't think that will work out either. I am going to look for a good CD to relieve some of this, and I will hopefully be good to go very soon.


I just found a bunch of stuff from yearbook. That made my day. It reminds me of the time I got to take my stuff home. I didn't have a lot of stuff in my box thing, so I took Ani Sweet's stuff instead. I wonder where it all went.


I'm not afraid of skeletons, but I get pretty freaked out when they walk around and take pictures of each other.

Poop

THE "W" SURVEY!!

**The Who's**

Who is in the house with you?:
Bread, Ash-hole, Dawn Noel, Brentie, Oreo

Who are you thinking about now?
Baby Jesus

Who did you last talk to on the phone?:
Zip

Whose house did you last go to?:
Robin K. Gahimer, C.P.A.

Whose birthday is next?
Adam Barlow has a birthday on June 9. Everyone call him and tell him to break up with Jesus.

Who was the last person you told you loved?
Fox McCloud

Who do you hope will take this survey?:
The Lord, Jesus Christ (I think I'll get drunk and beat up so)

Who is your cell phone carrier?:
I carry my own phone. I'm a big boy.

**The Whats**

What was the last thing you ate?:
Ice Creams

What was the last thing you drank?:
Melk

What color pants are you wearing?:
invisible, because i don't really have any pants on, because i'm a faggot and everyone knows this

what is the closest item to you that is blue?
a pretty pink parasol

What instant messaging service do you use?:
google talk

fav..color
pussypink

What is your most used phrase?:
i'm going as a cowgirl

What is your favorite website?:
google.com

What is your favorite shoe brand?:
pants

What song do you currently hear?:
"hate you" by the daredevils

What are you about to do?:
get some hot pussy


**The Wheres**

Where do you live?:
i like to see homos, naked

Where is your phone?
right here

Where do you sleep?:
in my boxers

Where did you get the shirt you're wearing?
i'm not wearing one of those either

Where did you get this survey?
why do you always assume people have clothes on?

Where is your best friend?
Rome

**The Whens**

When is your birthday?:
October 25

When did you last burn a candle?:
about the same time shawn last punched a librarian

When did you go to sleep last night?:
9:30

When was the last time you went to the mall?:
December somethingth

**The Whys**

Why does basically half the world have a Myspace?:
because the other half can't afford it

Why do we have to go to school?:
because people are idiots

Why are you on myspace right this moment?:
stalker hall

Sister's Myspace Bulletin Post

The person who wrote this is a genius. It may be true that I am a genius, but I didn't write it.




. . . . .HERE IS THE POST

young teenager

about 13 or 14

she thought this guy she adored

was a harmless handsome prince that would never hurt her

Jeff said he was 16

he asked her out one night to go to a party

she thought yesss finnaly a night with Jeff what more can i ask for

he said its a long ride so we will be getting back late

so you should tell ur parents u r sleeping over at ur friends house

she told her parents and left ==it was 6:13PM

::::: 4 hours later 10:13pm:::::
_Jeff is drunk and high he offered Bethany but she said no_

beth: wow u r right this is a long ride

Jeff: look i just want to let u know im 19 and we arent going to a
party

beth: (in a screaming way ) omg than where r we going

Jeff: look i just wanted to have our own life together .. u know like
run away u can lie about ur age get married have kids

beth: MARRIED ?? KIDS?? O HELL NO .. stop this car

jeff: nope ..

_beth tried opening the door and window but they wouldnt open_

jeff: child lock and window broke ... sorry baby

_beth spit on jeff_

beth: im not ur baby

_jeff reached over and slapped her_

jeff: i love you bitch

beth: (crying) ur drunk and high

_jeff stopped the car immediately ... he got out and opened the trunk ... he got out rope, tape, cocain, bottle water, large eye drop looking tube, knife, and a pipe ... _

jeff: (yelling) get out ... lets go !!! ... go over there...

beth: what did u get out of the trunk ??

jeff: ull see

_beth started screamming while jeff taped her mouth shut ..._

jeff: i knew i would need that

_jeff used the rope and tied beths legs to 2 different trees and
her arms ... jeff raped beth and beth passed out ... _

jeff: o you want to sleep now do ya maybe this will help u wake up ...

_jeff opened the bottle of water and poured a quarter pound of cocain in it ... he shook up the bottle .... then he took the medicine dropper and sucked up some of the mixture ... then he injected the tube into beths vagina ... she woke up spazzing from the cocain ... jeff took the rusty 12 inch pipe and shoved it up her vagina till she bled pulled it back out then shoved it up her butt til he couldnt see it no more ... then he jumped in his car and left .. _


bethany died from internal bleeding and drug over dose... if u have feelings for her and would never want this to happen to u then repost this story as "GIRLS PLEASE READ" so you can let all the girls be alerted off who they choose and what they should be aware of ... please we need to be strong girls....we need to know what we're doing

if your a girl repost this as "girls read this and boys dont ever do this ever"

if your a guy repost this as "id kill a muthafucka

Uncle Bread

Everyone hates Shawn. I think that's funny. It's especially good when he talks to his girlfriend on the phone and she calls him fat and he cries like a little emo cunt.

Hello.

I Quit My Jobbie

Not really. But that was the plan in the beginning. Tyler Stieneker was crushed when I gave him the news. He is the one responsible for pulling me back in. So, it appears that I will be working with him and Shawn Branham awhile still.

I am sooooo tired, you guys.

I had to be at work by 7:00 a.m. I didn't sleep at all last night.

Gay.

I was going to go to Elwood and tell them I wasn't retarded enough for the job. I guess that will have to wait a few more days.


Here's the thing. I really do work with numerous handicapable people. They make up the majority of the population there. I like them. I don't like the stupid people working on both sides of me in the line deal. They are not mentally retarded; they are just fucking stupid. I hate goddamn stupid people telling me what to do. Fuck them.

And that's the word.

Carson Daly, NV

So here's the dill.

Man, I like Firefox.

I finally got through all of my emells. Feel free to emell me anytimes nah.

I was bored yesterday, so I decided to invite people to use Google Talk with me. I thought at the time that you wouldn't need Gmail to use it, but I was wrong. That's a good thing, because now all the people I invited can join Gmail. Go ahead and give yourselves a pat on the back.

I didn't go to bed two nights ago, because the seniors wanted me to come cook out with them in the Shelbyville Senior High School parking lot.

I went to bed later that day, after watching a program on Harry Houdini on The History Channel. Well, I also went to imdb.com to check up on Kingdom Hearts II voice actors and ended up drawing some lines between "Drawn Together" and Final Fantasy X.

I slept for only about five hours yesterday, and then I was tired. I went to Stefan's dad's house (if you can believe that happy crappy) to hang out with some people. Clinton the Coffey maker came over, and I went with him and his girlfriend to a place to get a drink (Pepsi). We came back and had a good time. Some guys wanted to see my penis because they had heard rumors that it wasn't really as big as people say it is. They believed it when they saw me pull it down to my knee.

I ended up leaving that bunch, because I was hungry. I had no money, and no one would buy me a taco if I were to have driven them to Taco Bell. I went home and had some noodles, meatloaf, pop-tarts things, some shit and some other people.

I read a little while I sat sat on the toilet, and then I warshed my face and went to bed. I would have taken a shower, but I had to get up rill early to call Elwood to talk about my job offer.

So I guess it was about four o' the clock when I got in my bed. I couldn't sleep, and I'm not sure if I ever did. I got up at 7:45 a.m. I watched some cartoons, and then gave the Elwoods a call at 8:05 a.m. I go in tomorrow for initiation or lubrication or whatever it is. It should be good. I'm going to be building transmissions for lawn mowers or some stupid shit. I'm pretty excited about that. I don't know what the word is on blogging about my job, but I hope it gets me fired.

So, after my phone call with the lady, I tried to sleep. I ended up playing Kingdom Hearts II while I was in bed. Then I tried to sleep again--didn't work. I sat up and made my dad make me some breakfast. Then I downloaded some things.

I had to stop my last download, because goddamn Limewire was slowing my shit down so much.

It got really windy awhiles back and made my room cold. The thunder caused Oreo to take shelter under my bed, where he resides to this day. But it's pretty nice out, I must say.

I tried reading a few minutes ago, but I only got a few pages in before I started shutting down.

The Da Vinci Code got some pretty terrible reviews. I'm thinking about not seeing it now. I don't like shitty movies based on good books. I like shitty movies, but I don't like them making a good book look bad. I don't think I've ever liked a Ron Howard film, but Dan Brown assured me this one would be good. I just don't know anymore. This was kinda neat (gay), though.

Well, I think I'm gonna start getting ready.

1. Get ready.
2. Lift.
3. Eat.
4. Shower.
5. Go to bed.
6. Get the fuck out of here.